ditch,

the poetry that matters

Michael Mc Aloran

Michael Mc Aloran was Belfast born, (1976). His recent work has appeared in various anthologies & print and online zines in the U.S, U.K, India & Australia, including Carcinogenic Poetry, PMI, Calliope Nerve, The Delinquent, The Recusant, Sex & Murder Magazine, In Between Altered States, Horror, Sleaze & Trash, Negative Suck, Graffiti Kolkata, Pratishedhak, Prathamata, Danse Macabre, amphibi.us, The Plebian Rag, Full of Crow, Gloom Cupboard, Gutter Eloquence, Fashion For Collapse, Fragile Arts Quarterly, Clockwise Cat, Sein Und Werden, Milk Sugar, The Medulla Review, Counterexample Poetics, Heavy Bear, Mastodon Dentist, Nothing, No-one, Nowhere, etc. His artwork has also appeared in various journals, both print & online. He has published a number of chapbooks, including 'The Gathered Bones', (Calliope Nerve Media), 'Final Fragments', (Calliope Nerve Media), & 'The Death-Streaked Air' (Virgogray Press), 'Debris', (Erbacce-Press), ‘The Rapacious Night‘, (Calliope Nerve Media) & 'Unto Naught', (Erbacce-Press). A full length collection of poems, 'Attributes', with an introduction by Dom Gabrielli, was published by 'Desperanto', (NY), in 2011...He has also self-published a number of chapbooks, two novellas, a play, and another full-length collection, 'Of Dead Silences', is forthcoming from VOX Press in 2012...He has also spent time as Poetry Editor @ 'Calliope Nerve', an online American poetry zine...

                                                                      I

 

…Subtle, subtle then, subtle the without, unfailing, subtle then to end, embracing the hard char of the endlessly outreaching spasm, biting the bone will of embers, embers, there struck out and soundless, where the heart commences, in the nucleus of the star’s apathy, snapped shut, unto, unto the breathless night… 

…Aligned, then, aligned, no not of the broken then, knocking thrice yet never of the having spoken of less, opulent as the tongue that birthed the dreaming scar, all along, abandoned, set to flame, hollow within hollow, where dread and winds collide and the outcome settles, in the sands of the flesh...

…Back-thrown, once more, ever-belonging to the less and less, some shadow, no, not the taste of bitter ashes, nothing of that regard, some shadow’s permeation, sudden to expire, where the claim is set to the corners of the sky...Wishful, then…Where to/ of now, but to the sky’s final rupturing…

(…Walls…nectar walls of ice…stillness once more…strike out…nothing claimed…)

…Mock the unknown silence, of all that has ever been…(head of an unknown    dredging the less and less of some wound placed in the mouth/ some scarlet there…)

…Drag out the cadaver of flay, the echoing flesh of it, ‘til absurdity clogs the heartless lung of final excavation…Head unsung, burning lest the flesh fall away, where nothing else reaches, ‘til still again, the head unsung…

…Subtle to move unfailing, never to fall, ever to fall, clasp-knife of desire, dragged along, to where the absence is little else but…All is death and all is burgeoning sunlight…The cracks in the walls…b l e e d…the white blood of nutrient…Nothing to taste of it…Lessened…Shock-stone of collaborative reek…

…Strip away….strip the light from out of sudden held…Colossus/ stylus…Pulse-beat…

(Without cause…)

…Drag again/ unto ocean/ drag once more/ electric lights…

…Of some dead chalice echoing forth of the silence, of the final stasis…

…Pause/ return/ shale of indigo…(the bones chime in the winds)…I drown, I reappear…I feel the scald of all that approaches and settle to fall, subtle as a shattered fist, a torn lung, an exposed heart…Where now of the drag, and of the scattering light….The eyelids, swollen over…

 

 

                                                                  II

 

…Ask of nothing, and know of the less and more as if to say, as if before, never birthed, sudden to expire and of the deft caress of willow, snap-still to crucible eye, knocking out the spasm, (again), settled as dead…

…I fear the winds, yet cannot conceive of them…I fear the nothing more, the winds may yet no longer come, yet they return, I expire in black tar shadows where there is nothing but…

(--Knock again--)

…Deciduous heart…

…I cannot…(I sever…)

…Here/ now locked to the salient grin of it, the struck stone of it, scattering my death carelessly to the open wound of the sky…

…Traceless, then, (-I’ll be-), cold stone in a winter gathering…

…Night’s embrace, ever the eye, searching-struck unto fathom of sheer, drunken, the bruised skin still tastes the same, the blood the same…

…I ask…

(‘Who forever asks of the dead sun?…’)

…I ask of the ash…a final retort…spasm and murmur…stammering churlishly into a pit of seasoned voices…voices voiceless…erased…nothing claimed…yet dense…acre wind and the blood/ skin/ meat all silent-willed…scattered once more…spit into the haven of drought…the light burning the second issuing of silence gathered…ask what of it…scatter then fold…I ask of the ash…I am burning alive…there is nothing to say of it, yet still I…

“The sky here collapses daily, as if to mock, we reclaim but there is never anything but of which to there or there else what of the none ‘til knock what of the done ‘til light aligned of the none exposed.”

(All traced…ever the broiling purpose of the excavating scream…)

…Dense with filtering light…

(Spoken for…)

…I trade with the flies, I trade with the carrion flies…

 

 

                                                                 III

 

…A bell jar of collapsed echoes, and the dead entrails of foreign speech no longer the settled, no longer there or else/ (sudden, sudden…sudden gleam of tears…)

…Here rolls the dead eye and the forever getting it over with, (-begin again…)

…All sprung from withheld…   

(I see the eye yet I cannot see…)

…I laugh yet I am dead…I steal the laughter, from out of the senselessness, of death….      

…In my gravestone vanity, I eclipse…

…I eclipse of the ever having uttered…from smoke ‘til sounding…echoing trails of nothing…nowhere…traces/ ashen…

(The endless night, is melding colours into nothing…)

…A brick wall, dense with ivy…scattered bones litter the fresh cut grass, with their bound secrets…(all…not a word…beyond sound….)

…Ah, I remember the…I remember the dreaming of…taste upon havoc and the blank teeth chattering…silent…chattering in the murk…

(Cataract of the exposed heart…)

…Torn bleak and wildly in the flaming haze of anguish, to lick the cool stones scattered in the fleshy earth…Soil of despair drenched with final vacancy…

…‘Til spun hard and closed redressing the scuttle of the limbs, tracing out the burnish upon scattered shadows flittering in the half-light, knowing of the less or of the more, absolved, the gouge in the gait silenced, knowing of the less and less, unto sparkle, unto ever but naught…

…I’ll speak ‘til haven to toil/ spat at the winds the sky the sun and all that breathes in the mercury light….

…There’ll yet be a heart, it is said, all spoken for, all said I no longer dream I dream of that which……cancels…I ingest my own negation, I scar I cannot scar as if to breathe were something venerable…it comes and goes…as consistent as the flesh’s frailty…

(Knock again…)

…Exodus of…speech redeemed…drag up thy cross, and walk….

 

 

                                                                  IV

 

…Ah, that was of the venture unknown, the spiderling of rotting hours, ‘til the breathing ceases, and the fragrance, emanates from the soil’s kiss…Little else but of the now ‘til the darkness shatters, meagre, I cease to breathe, I spit it out, knocking the bone fury out of the gaping eye…

And of then all said, all silenced, never having uttered, collapsed once more    unto yet of the final, or, yielding nothing, shearing the sky with echoing laughter, all the while the absences, nothing left to yield…

I close my palm upon the winds and bleed from the orchid glass of silenced silences, back then unto the hollow dust, beneath the drapery sun, the shiv in the flesh of awareness…   

Awakening, or, of the naught ‘til web of stricken lights, cut close to wick, the flame shimmering in the fading darkness…

Final ice unto which to succumb, revealing the stretched sun’s quarry, aching to be damned, yet what of it…

(I see the vault of my own dead laughter, endlessly vibrating into the unknown, where my final meat has championed the earth…And so in these fresh cut gardenias of toxic grandeur, here or now the earth, there now the sickly breath of a fading scream, rolled upon the tongue, settled…absentee…)

 

                                                                    ***

  

 
                                                                        V

 

…Of a word, (--no nothing--), of which has come before, nor begun, until the last drift, spun silken of sinew clear…

…Spun silken begun of the first sinew ‘til the last echoing breath…dead all but one, having eroded, scattered clear, dread along step where no reaching purpose snares, so echoing, dead, of the first reaching, spun/ begun…

…Tread without mirroring…sky of insectal swarming…the moon pierces the bloodshot eye…embers of laughter…all said yet still the thrash of the blade…   

…The hands tremble…

                                      …Night resounds, through spectral tide…

 

                                                                         ***

 

 
                                                                      VI

 

…Devouring, (yes or no), devouring the yes and no…Abated sky…

(Teaming with death…)

…Headlong, into the grit of teeth, mocking the stitch of, trace of the eyes liquid, stillness, stillness, colourless night and day…

…Orchid/ crystalline/ desire/ spent flesh of a verminesque absence/ all claimed but for the unsung, ’til again…

(I renege, I am of the nothing else, I count each finger as it falls to the bloody earth…)

…Ah, what of this butchery…vibrant/ traces…brittle skin…kisses/ shadows        unto which to desire as one subsides, birthed into the none of, spitting the blood of harlequin desires…

…A face smashed in…

…Blood-red flowers wilting in a vase…

                                                              (…My deliria…)

…Shimmer of foreign purpose, the words alack, spilling like cum to dredge from out of…

              …a pissoir in flames…

(Knock again…)

…Devouring, yes or no, all sounds erased, in paralysis of gesture, motion, inhaling the rotting skyline…

…I inhale, the final bones of purpose…

 

                                                                      ***

  

 
                                                                       VII

 

…Denuded scarlet, burning of the erased sky/ mind/ where the mind is sky is sky alone…The murmurs scattered, till sullen breach, sunken vial of eclipsed…

…Ask of the none all the while of the uprooted, birthed, sink into thy clamour where the silence breeds…

(Piss-reek…

The death of the origin…)

…Dry winds, choking out the dust unto some foreign fields, breeding the skinned flesh/ meat of/ futility of…

…In pageantry of soundless whispers, drained from the skull-clad heart, a shovel to turn soil,

                      feeding where the laughter breaks

 the shoreline…

…Ask of the vapours, I’ll laugh out of turn once again…I’ll bleed of it…

…Sunken, yet still the eye roving…

…Knotted fields of effortless dreaming, slashed across, the hands falling to the sides….    

…I breathe alone I do not whisper, yet in the night’s commence, valiant as…none…

…Sung less in winter havoc, nothing left, but the absent fragments…

 

                                                                       ***

  

 
                                                                     VIII

 

…Liquid dreams, carouse the ever having been, yet stillness there, blank, motionless as a cadaver, subtle as carrion flowerings…

…Oblivion sweet oblivion, a violent kiss to staunch the coagulated night, till fallen asunder/

                            stray/

                                        at the hilt of death…

…Embraced/ benign/ flux of the escaping breath, sudden unto downfall, scratching away the skin…

(…In silence’s   

                                     twilight landscape…)

 

…Mocked by the astray of words still desolate, where the lungs vibrate of the spun sharp sickened of, fragmented of…

…All along, it has often been said, elixir of fallen speech claiming the shadows, yet still in tide of spoken, locked to the bone, there’ll yet be another, shock of the dead rat pelt, of abortive scar…

…Bone or lung, and the in-drowning of it…I see/ I see the nothing left of it, where spoken of scatters the strips of flesh/ sinew/ the shudder of vagrant reek, into the emptiness…

…I collide…The walls do not shift I collide, sickened by vacant hope…

…In my dreaming I die, I die absolute, where the feathered mask of decay shifts from one mirror unto another…

                 (Collapse/ dredge/ obsolete/ benign…)

…All but for the…Never knowing of it, wordless/ traceless/ spat out…

…Subtle as winds cracking the whip of it, in dry weather…

…Arc of a dead grace…

…Liquid                                                 as the sky’s indifference…

 

                                                                           ***

 

 

                                                                 IX

 

…Breaking, without favour/ nocturne…Ash upon the skin…Through the needle’s eye, of some nowhere else to be…

…I am fading as of birth birthed into this death-dreaming, knocking upon the dusts of, knocking upon the shadow of, knock upon a sixpence of…

…Ah, a broken mirror, a serrated edge, the drool of some vacant efficacy, all lights being vacancy, spit of bone, spit of…silent meat…

(…The shadow    vanes the sky…)

…I fall inwardly in reams of silken flame, I douse, I ignite, I am nothing else, but of seams of sound rattling in the starry skull of absent breathing…                                         

…All said…all resounding of all else…till irredeemable…I burn without subtlety, in the scar/ lack/ night of it I am absolved, no not birthed, never else but once, I exhale the laughter of my birthing…

…Inward/ else, where/ there, teaming of night’s hazard, close the door/ close the wound/ close the…

…Vault of disclosure…hemmed in or without…claustrophobia of nothingness…

…Knock/ trace of banquet dark…echoing without…trace/ anguish of the hour spent in the absence of an hour…in the light’s echoing…chanting, of the bone’s efficacy…

                   (My pulse…vibrating of the distance traced…rixt…absurd…)

 

                                                                      ***

  

 
                                                                        X

 

…Origin…origin…snuffing out the flame of the meat/ tongue ashen wild with circular dreaming…’til unsaid, unspoken of, stretched out, the smear traces across the wind, gutter-fresh in amber desire…

…Subtle as of what ‘til else, stagnant the ever-reaching hand, in catascope of the absent head, settling the none of nothing/……

…Never the glance of it, to trace the skin, ‘til mockery again, knocking once more, from plateau unto some other foreign, motion none, expired breath, then again back then to held from where it all begins, again…

…No hands offered, where the sky breaks its’ shell, in the lack and redeem from out of which the pulse pushes the word, the murmur…

                                  (…I remember the taste…)

…I remember the broken glass of sudden…echoing forth…not a…I remember the ruthless silence, such was my liberty…

(…Breathe again…)

…Of the night’s treasury where only the…/ foraging/ endless/ dead but one…

…Subtle as…where breath misplaced will dredge the whole…

                                                              (…An eye crushed in a dissolute fist…)

 

                                                                         ***

  

 
                                                                         XI

 

…Cemetary…

                         …lashed to the…

…Bone break and the nocturne of it, till ammend of sudden shrill shriek of pitch…Bone light in the palm of hand dragged from the vault of night’s endless shadows…Wind clad in some vacated room but one in the depths of pitch…

…Laughter and then…

…Spill lest there echo the in-dreaming of foreign absolute…

…Headless till vast…(succumb)…breath without air…

…Cemetary heart…

                                    …of the etched sands of whispers, drenched in foreign, ever where the ocean of the skull unfolds…

…Crystalline tears of…

…Words erased…

…Sound without meaning…ever to clutch the fragrant none of speeches, vagaries…Known without/ ever none/ no not known/ breathing of the lack/ begin again/ end once more…

…My absence beneath the brailed sky…

…Severed of the all and in between, ruptured once, ruptured once more…

…Attrition/ exile…

                    …I genuflect to nothing, in a vacancy of shit…

  

 
                                                                         XII

 

…In a suicide of final teeth, bound to where/ lest there prosperous, claiming the dead season of the eye, stretched unto hollow, where nothing is nor will ever be, scattered as of silences, lest bound again once more, I in languorous, shuddering, I in-breath, amputated…

…I drag up this flayed corpse of nothing, it flays in return…I am a sarcophagus of embers/ absences…

…Death’s dragoons, of the burning earth, ‘til shadow mocks the pageantry, ever, ever out from which I cannot, alack, spun black of oracle emptiness…

(Knock once more…

                                     …naught but once…

Silent all,

                 Surmounting…)

…Fresh severed flowers, bleeding for the absence to come…

…The sun’s vice tears where the indigenous wound collects the none…

…All dragged/ all along/ walls of flesh…

…The heart        stings…

…I churn breath to close fists upon, ever of/ stillness collapsed…Smoke swirls in a violent room of vacancy…

                                                       …Dead I, but one…

 

 

                                                                     ***

 

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                                                                                                                               November 21, 2011